The Decline of Print Media (A Long Rant)

I feel a rant comin' on! Am I the only person to notice that newspapers and magazines aren't what they once were? I love to read the paper in the morning. I read it and do the puzzles. It wakes my brain up. I like finding out what is going on in the world AND locally.

We get the Mpls StarTribune (STRIB). Lately I have begun to suspect that it is being written by college interns. I am tired of reading an article and wondering, "What do you suppose they MEANT to say here?". There are egregious typos and errors in usage. (Does the paper not have spell-check?) Maps are misprinted and never corrected. They dumped the "mistake correction" department ages ago, so all mistakes stand as the truth unless it's a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Most of the news comes straight off the wire service. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, it seems the other papers still have spell check and use words of more than two syllables. It does mean however, that someone has picked what THEY think we want for news. It's the local news that takes the biggest hit. It leans on opinion columns and police blotters. On Mondays, they combine the "world" and "local" sections into one section now. I know things are tough all over, but the paper is at least half advertising. I want NEWS.

My definition of what IS news is also apparently different from the world's definition. Paul says most people are getting their news on-line now, so I looked online. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong place, but the newspaper's website has even less news than the paper. It just skims the highlights, and does not put up all new content daily, so you don't know what's new news and what's old news.

Remember when Saturday Night Live had "Short Attention Span Theater"? That's what we have going on here. Not just Minnesota, but world wide. There was a morning news program we saw on vacation in England several years ago called "The Bigger Breakfast". It was just quick news headlines, leaning heavily towards celebrity gossip. Paul and I laughed, hah! "news" for 16 year olds! Now that's all any of us have. Look at the MSN homepage. Celebrity gossip and speculation.

Journalists used to strive for unbiased reports of things which have actually happened. Opinions were welcomed on the opinion pages. Speculation on news events was limited and limited to actual experts on the topics. Now it's all blurry as to what is fact and what is opinion. The Strib slants left, I know. If my news is going to slant, I at least want it to slant my direction.

Do you recall some time ago when the big news of the day was that Ashton Kutcher had more Twitter followers than CNN? I weep for the future. What Ashton had for breakfast should not be important to anyone but Ashton!

Magazines are losing content as well. One magazine I get has recently combined several similar publications into one. To serve me better. Yeah. Or to publish a magazine with half the staff. If I wanted to subscribe to a 4-wheelin' magazine, I would have done so! Also, I do notice when I used to get 12 issues and now I get 6 for the same (or higher) price.

Book publishing may soon be a thing of the past as well. It is so much cheaper to sell books online that there may be no more bookstores! I saw an episode of "Star Trek - The next Generation" one time that showed Capt. Picard reading an actual book and explaining to an amused first officer that he liked real books better than ones on computer. I thought, "That'll never happen!", but it's looking like paper books will be as obsolete as 8 track tapes. Just like most people now buy their music on-line, we'll be buying books the same way. We won't have a choice.

Like we didn't have a choice in the Hi-def TV switchover. I do not find it to be an improvement. After purchasing new tvs, converter boxes and antennas, I do NOT GET BETTER RECEPTION! I lose a lot of the sound to digital hiccups. My friend Mary Ann now has to put her TV in the middle of the floor and hold onto the antenna if she wants to watch FOX "News" (don't get me started). All those extra free channels we now get? Cartoons, hymn singing and one channel that never seems to have anything on it except a show in which bikini-clad women tour zoos. (Ion-life, channel 41-3). This is not better. Don't spit in my face and tell me it's raining!

Whew! Sorry, but I feel better! I have been reading "Julie and Julia". It is pretty good. It's about a woman who cooks every recipe in Julia Child's "Mastering the Art of French Cooking". I looked at my copy of the cookbook. This is a book about doing things the hard way. I would not be able to cook all those recipes without changing them. I wouldn't cook the yucky sounding ones at all. I try not to make nasty food on purpose! Anyway, Julie fights through the whole chapter on aspic. Aspic is meat (or fish) jello. Ick. This week I made tomato juice jello. It wasn't bad, actually, in a June Cleaver's bridge luncheon kind of way. As I tasted it, I was thinking it was like eating a Bloody Mary with a spoon. Then it hit me! Bloody Mary Jello shots! Genius! That would really liven up a brunch, wouldn't it? I'll give you the June Cleaver version and mine.

Molded Tomato Salad

2 envelopes unflavored gelatin
1/3 cup cold water
1/3 cup finely chopped onion
1/3 cup finely chopped celery
2 tsp sugar
1/2 tsp celery seed
3 1/2 cups tomato juice
1 tbls worcestershire sauce.
Spicy Buttermilk Dressing (recipe follows)

Soften gelatin in water. While it is softening, combine rest of ingredients (except dressing) in a pot and simmer for 5 minutes. Remove from heat and add gelatin, stir until gelatin dissolves. Pour into a pretty jello mold and chill until set. Unmold and serve with buttermilk dressing.

Spicy Buttermilk Dressing
1 cup mayo
1 cup buttermilk
1 tsp chopped parsley or cilantro
2 tsp tabasco sauce
1/4 tsp black pepper
Combine ingredients to make 2 cups dressing.


Bloody Mary Jello Shots

2-3 envelopes unflavored gelatin (see note)
1/2 cup water
1/3 cup each finely chopped onion and celery
1/2 tsp celery seed
3 1/2 cups Bloody Mary mix
1 cup vodka
Pickles, olives, pickled jalapenos as desired for garnish

Soften gelatin in water. (Note: use 2 envelopes gelatin if making shots in little plastic cups. Use 3 if you will cut it up into Knox-blox like squares). Simmer onion, celery, celery seed and Bloody Mary mix for 5 minutes. Remove from heat, add gelatin stirring until dissolved. Add vodka. Pour into little plastic cups or a pan that will give you one or one and a half inch squares of jello. Put a slice of pickle, olive or jalapeno on top, shoot away.

Smooth Saling

"My name is Kellet, and I'm a purse addict". I'm a sick girl. (Not literally, I am over my virus, thank you for your well wishes).

I love purses. I love to buy them at garage sales where they are very reasonably priced. All but 4 of these handbags came from garage sales. Of those, 2 came from the Duluth Pack store (on sale) and 2 I bought at an illegal purse party! They are designer knock-offs, and were frighteningly expensive (to me) for poorly made plastic. Still, I was caught up in the madness and grabbed several ADORABLE bags and then put back all but two. Sick AND weak! I bought two more today. Mr. Ose does not understand (nor does any man) why I NEED so many of these. I must confess that last week I bought a basket meant to take a bottle of wine on a picnic and tried to use it as a purse. It was cute, but wouldn't hold a book, so I had to give it up.

This is the best (and possibly ugliest) garage sale item I have bought this year. It is a HUGE chair and matching ottoman. ($8). It does not fit in my living room AT ALL, either the decor or the size! However, the whole family loves it (including the pets) and we all fight to be the first in it after supper. Guess who never wins the race? MOM! (Somebody has to put the food away, so I always lose.)












This is last week's major score. Five sets of vintage salt & pepper shakers for 50 cents each! I collect these, adding to my grandmother's collection. The little orange dogs have a very evil expression on their faces, I'm a little scared of them.








Here is a mixed bag. The Pampered Chef Chillzanne platter was a great deal. The odd green bean slicer was not. It was supposed to french cut the beans, but instead it kind of chipped them. No good. Fifty cents down the drain!









Another bad deal, this hummingbird feeder leaked sugar water all over the deck.

















The potpourri in the basket smells like aftershave. I don't like it. Also I bought two nice bras for 75 cents each. They were almost new! It wasn't until I got home and tried them on that I noticed the extra hardware. THEY WERE NURSING BRAS! Still, they are newer than anything else I have, and comfortable!

The goofiest thing I ever found in an alley is this throne. We use it for preschool.
This is "Chicken on a Throne" one of my favorite summer recipes. Rub a chicken with your favorite BBQ rub such as: Citrus Rub 4 Tbls Kosher salt 4 tsps black pepper 2 Tbls lemon zest 2 tsp dried marjoram 4 tsp dried thyme 1/2 tsp ground coriander OR: BBQ Rub 1 1/2 Tbls kosher salt 2 Tbls brown sugar 3/4 tsp cumin 1 1/2 tsp chili powder 1 1/2 tsp black pepper 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper 2 Tbls paprika 1 1/2 tsp onion powder 1 1/2 tsp garlic powder OR just rub that chicken with Lowrey's seasoning salt. Drink half a can of beer and stuff the can (and remaining beer) up the big hole at the bottom of the chicken. Put the chicken in a pan such as an 8x8 cake pan (disposable is genius, but flimsey). The bird should balance on the beer can with the legs providing the rest of the tripod. Put this in the grill, (or oven) close lid and cook until done (160 degrees, maybe 45 minutes?). The hardest part is removing that can without spilling boiling beer. The chicken is very moist and tender, with crispy, salty skin. YUM!
I apologize for the odd set-up of today's blog. I imported a "purse" recipe thinking it would be cute, but instead it was badly behaved and won't even let me delete it. It's down below here, messing up the margins. Serves me right for trying to do it the easy way!

Chocolate Beggar’s Purse

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This is a fancy Greek dessert simplified. Inside a flaky pastry is a brownie topped with peanut butter and chocolate. The name comes from it looking like an empty purse. I serve these at dinner parties, and people are always impressed.

SERVES 8 (change servings and units)

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Ingredients

• 1 (19 1/2 ounce) fudge brownie mix

• 1/2 cup oil
• 1/4 cup water
• 1 egg
• 2 (8 ounce) cans refrigerated crescent dinner rolls
• 1/2 cup creamy peanut butter
• 2 1/2 tablespoons sugar
• 1 cup chocolate fudge frosting

Garnish

• vanilla ice cream
• chocolate syrup, for serving

Directions

1. 1

   Coat bottom and sides of 9x9-inch baking pan with nonstick cooking spray. Combine brownie mix, oil, water and eggs. Beat 50 strokes. Bake according to directions on box, 350 for 30 minutes. Cool. Cut into 8 squares.

2. 2

   On a lightly greased baking sheet, separate dough into 8 rectangles. Firmly press perforations to seal. Place one brownie in the center of each rectangle.

3. 3

   Stir peanut butter and sugar in small bowl to blend.

4. 4

   Top brownies with 1 heaping tablespoon chocolate frosting and 1 tablespoon peanut butter mixture.

5. 5

   Pull four corners of dough to center of chocolate mixture. Twist firmly to form top of purse.

6. 6

   Bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes, or until lightly golden. Let cool at least 15 minutes before serving, but serve slightly warm.

7. 7

   When serving, cut each “purse” in half, displaying the inside. Add a scoop of vanilla ice cream, and drizzle with chocolate syrup.

Blah

I'm sick. The boys both got this little bug last week, and now it's my turn. Headache, scratchy throat, feeling blah. I don't want to get off the couch. (How is that different from every other day?)

We had such a great day yesterday, too! I pulled 2 wheelbarrow loads of weeds, Nate mowed the lawn, Paul fixed the hot tub, then we cooked dinner (hotdogs) on a stick, over a little bonfire. I like a little fire but I stress over whether it's totally out or not. We always have a shovel and the hose handy when we have a fire, for my peace of mind. We live right by the Boy Scout camp, so there would be lots of fuel if our fire got away from us. We sprayed the fire when we went to bed, but I checked on it when I woke up in the middle of the night. Sure enough, there were still coals, so there I was at 3:30 a.m., spritzing down the fire pit in my nightie! I wouldn't have gotten another wink of sleep otherwise.

So anyway, today I feel like heck. The boys (neither of whom whined this much last week) assure me I'll feel better in a day or two. In the meantime I have an easy recipe. Nick brought this home from FACS class (family and consumer sciences or what we used to call home ec). I'm hoping that since it's "his" recipe, he'll make it for me!

Mock Orange Julius
1 can (6oz) frozen orange juice concentrate
1 cup milk
1 cup water
1/2 tsp vanilla
18 ice cubes
2 Tbls sugar, if desired

Place all ingredients (liquids first) in blender and blend until smooth.

Waste Not, Want Not

Waste not, want not is an old saying meaning, "make use of what you have, or you must not want it". As a teacher, I don't get paid in the summertime, so we are really trying to make use of what we already have. Yesterday I made use of a nice, rainy day by cleaning my whole house! HAHA! No, not really! That would be silly. And NOT fun. I quilted. Also, it's hard to enjoy a nice rainy day when tornadoes go roaring through Mpls, creating 6 hours of tv coverage of the same downed tree. While I quilted, I listened to CDs I borrowed from the library. "Gaelic Storm" has a CD entitled "What's the Rumpus?" that is really fun. Putumayo's "Latin groove" was also excellent. I love the library.
So this was my project for yesterday. See? the kitty has a candy dispenser filled with mice. Cute, Huh? I have had this pattern for years and never started it. I am also trying not to buy new fabric and patterns until I use up some of the old stuff, and finish some of my UFO's (unfinished objects). All I bought for this one was a fat quarter (1/4 yard) of dark green, and the iron-on stuff. The cat was supposed to be black and white, but I changed him to look more like Merlin, who would LOVE a mouse dispenser. It is hard not to buy new fabric when it's all so pretty, those of you with paper stashes feel the same way, I know. While digging through my fabric, I found some cool stuff I had forgotten, so that was a bonus.






We have had a membership to Lifetime fitness for years. I am sorry to say that I have not always made use of it. Now I am signed up with our HMO to get money off the membership fee if I go 12 times a month. This is the motivation I needed! They are PAYING me to exercise. Somebody should, it IS work. I have gone back to yoga class. I actually like yoga. It is a really good workout, I get all sweaty and worn out and my muscles hurt for days, so it must be working! I like how the instructors say not to worry what you look like doing yoga (good thing, because I look like a walrus who can't make it up the beach) and not to worry if your body releases toxins (sweating) or gas. Well, now I have something new to worry about! What if I fart during that crocodile thing I hate so much? Also, I have to remember not to eat too much dinner before class, so I can actually touch the floor!
One of the ways I excel at not being wasteful is in not wasting food. I made a meatloaf once with crushed breakfast cereal instead of crackers. I didn't go over well. ("Why does the meatloaf taste like KIX?") Paul said he didn't know whether to put ketchup on it, or milk. They LIKED the one made with crushed Cheezits!
Farmer's markets are a great bargain. I buy lots of stuff that I put in the freezer for winter. It's easy to get carried away, though, and if you don't do something with this produce, you just threw your money away. Sweet corn is in season here, and it is really good! I often buy several dozen ears, cut off the kernals, cook it in the roaster and freeze it in dinner sized portions. Then we just nuke it when we want the taste of summer. Corn is sold by the dozen or half dozen. We are a family of four, so six is usually too many ears for one meal. I cook it anyway and cut off the corn from the extra. This can be frozen or thrown into something else (like goulash), or be reheated for the "smorgasbord of leftovers" we have whenever the leftovers start piling up. Today's recipe is for salsa you can make with leftover corn and stuff from your garden or the farmer's market.




Yesterday, I made the boys clean their rooms and try on all their clothes to see what they had outgrown (pretty much all of it, sigh). Nate found this in his room (it used to be a stuffed dinosaur)
and gave it to Nick. Nick doen't like to waste things either, so he says it's his new hat. He is going to make a great impression on his first day of high school!







Corn and Bean Salsa

1 can drained and rinsed black beans
Corn cut off of 2-3 cooked ears (or one can, drained)
1 small can chopped black olives
2-3 chopped fresh tomatoes
8 oz shredded monterey Jack cheese
1 bunch green onions, chopped
1 bunch cilantro, leaves chopped, stems discarded
1/2 tsp chili powder
1/2 tsp cumin
8 oz italian salad dressing
1/2 pound bacon, chopped and fried OR 1/2 pound of fried sausage
1 small can chopped green chilis (do not make the mistake of thinking this is the same thing as a small can of chopped jalapenos. Only substitute jalapenos if you really like it spicy!)

Mix everything and eat with those Tostitos tortilla chips that are like little bowls, or Fritos scoops. It's a pretty drippy salsa.

Blast from the Past

Last night I went to an "informal" high school reunion. It was for the classes of 1980-1985 at St. Paul Central High School. It was held at O'Gara's in St. Paul. This was a great way to do a reunion, minimal cost (only what you ordered at O'Gara's), no pressure, come whenever, wear whatever.
I took my boys to O'Gara's in December. They said, "This is a good restaurant, Mom, how did you know it was here?" Because I GREW UP in that neighborhood! They were floored to find out I had a life before they were born. It was one of the first bars in which I tried out the new fake ID. We were pretty sure that if we turned our class rings around backwards, they looked like wedding rings, and therefore made us look older. Yeah, that fooled EVERYONE!

This is my BFF Maureen. We have been friends since 6th grade, (35 years by my count). If you do not have a friend of 35 years standing, my advice to you is to go and get one! Our parents were friends, our sisters were friends, our brothers were roomates, you get the picture, lots of history. Nobody can make me laugh like Maureen. We have been kicked out of shopping malls for laughing like hyenas! For a while, we tried on hats in every store. We both look silly in hats, Reen looks like Eliza Doolittle and I look like Mr. Ed. Each hat was funnier than the one before until, tears of laughter running down our faces, we were thrown out! Seriously, we were ROTFL. They probably thought we were off our meds. Maureen moves around a lot, she's a nomad elementary school teacher. Still, whether we are in the same state or not, we pick up our converstion right where we left off and keep going. Although we went to different high schools our senior year, Maureen and I (unknowingly) picked the same prom dress! (Gunnesax, of course!) It was Maureen who insisted we go to this reunion (and kept telling me, "You look just fine, build a bridge and get over it!") If you will recall, it rained like cats and dogs Saturday night, so I had that whole "drowned rat" look going for me. Anyway, we reconnected with lots of old friends.

One of our old friends was Norbert. I dated him when I was a a junior and he was a senior, something like that. We had nice dates, until he DUMPED ME! He told me he was breaking up with me because he "didn't want to sin"! For the record, I had NO INTENTION of sinning with Norbert (whom my family calls "Nerdbert" to this day.) Maureen said it was just that I was so cute, he couldn't stand the temptation. Don't ya love her? Anyway, Norbert is a very nice man, devoted to his wife and 6 children, so it all worked out. (Almost makes me sorry I told everyone he was becoming a priest!)

Next, Henry stopped by to chat. I dated Henry when I was a sophomore and he was a senior. My parents had a cow. My mother called Henry "that hood" because he wore a black leather jacket and smoked! It was like dating Fonzie. When Henry dumped me (to go to prom with Michelle M.) he gave me the whole, "it's not you, it's me" speech. Actually, he was very nice about it, but apparently felt bad because he apologized for the dumping last night! I assured him I was well over it and even had fun that prom night without him. Maureen was not helping and jokingly said that if Mike "Rook" Rogalski showed up, the trifecta of Kellet-dumpers would be complete!

Do you think that I dated mob guys, since everybody had a nickname? Mostly, it was my family. One young man showed up at a party at my house proudly sporting a sparse beard. My mother still calls him "old three hairs"!

The table we sat at started filling up with band people, choir people and drama people (I was a three time geek!) it was so nice to see them all. We caught up with each other and missed the people who were gone for good. On the way out the door, I saw Kathy Hallinan and gave her a big hug. She had no idea who I was. Awkward. When we got to the parking lot, Maureen and I figured out that I was thinking of PATTY Hallinan! (Hallinans are thick on the ground in St. Paul). Good thing we left.

How's it going teaching Nate to drive? Could be better. We were planning on cutting down this tree anyway.

I was looking for a "retro" recipe for you. This is one of Grandma Louise's. Refrigerator pickles are pretty old fashioned, you can tell when it has the notation, "A good keeper", meaning it lasts a long time in storage.

Kind of like old friendships, worth keeping!










Refrigerator Pickles

7 cups unpeeled, sliced cucumbers
1 cup sliced onions
1 cup green pepper rings (optional, in my opinion)
1 Tbls salt
1 cup vinegar
3/4 cup sugar
1 Tbls celery seed

Mix everything and store in refrigerator. Can be eaten in 2 days. A good keeper.

NOW, It's Summer!

Baby, it's hot outside! I'm NOT complaining, it wouldn't be summer in Minnesota if the air wasn't thick enough to sleep on. Of course, we have air conditioning, so we are not suffering in any way. As a matter of fact, I went downstairs and found the boys wrapped in blankets, as the lower level is always colder than upstairs (where the thermostat is). I adjusted the thermostat so the kids wouldn't get frostbite and so we wouldn't have to give all our money to the electric company!

I'm starting to feel the end of summer coming near. I am getting the urge to can everything in sight. Today we picked chokecherries from the bikepath and I'm making syrup. You cannot imagine how good that is on waffles! Do you want the recipe for this? Not a lot of people pick wild stuff anymore (HAH! More for me!). It's only unfortunate that canning season coincides with the time of year you REALLY don't want to have a huge kettle of boiling water steaming up your house!

I was going to get so much done this summer, and I...haven't. I DID get the quilt top done for the church raffle. I didn't revamp the perennial beds, I didn't get all my recipes scanned into the computer, I DID get the koi pond in, I did read a lot of good books. (The 2 best were "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" and "The Time Traveler's Wife").

I didn't watch a lot of TV, thank goodness. There's nothing on! Last night I saw the most disturbing show ever, it was called "Toddlers and Tiaras" and is about child beauty pageants. It is sooo creepy to see a 25 year old showgirl's face on a 4 year old's body. It is all about makeup, spray tans (even the African-American children), fake teeth, sequined dresses and wigs bigger than the child! I'm trying to put my finger on the difference, but if these same kids put on make-up, wigs and costumes and put on a play, I'd be all for it. I think the difference is that the child knows a character in a play isn't really her. It's about a skill, acting. The beauty pageant contestant is being judged on looks. (Yeah, I saw the "talent" portion). Anyway, I hated it.

I have been waiting for hot weather to give you this recipe. It's for cookies you make in the waffle iron! See, you don't have to turn on the oven and heat up the house! But you still get cookies! I wonder if these would work in the George Forman grill? Grilled cookies, brilliant!

You go make cookies, I'm going to go lay in the hammock, drink iced tea and read a book. I' m gonna enjoy summer while it lasts.

Waffle Cookies

1/4 cup butter or margarine
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 egg
2 Tbls milk
2/3 cup flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/3 cup chopped nuts (optional)

Oil waffle maker if needed. Preheat waffle maker. Beat butter for 30 seconds, add sugar, beat until fluffy. Add egg and milk and beat well. Combine flour and baking powder and add to wet ingredients. Mix well, stir in nuts if using. Drop by rounded teaspoons 2 inches apart onto hot waffle maker. Close lid, bake 2 minutes. Cool on wire rack. Drizzle with icing.

Icing

1/2 cup powdered sugar
several drops vanilla extract
2-3 tsp milk
-mix until smooth.

Squishy is good

We went up north to the cabin which belongs to Paul's relatives this weekend. We had no sooner pulled in than Nick came running back to the truck yelling, "SKUNK"! There was a skunk by the door! We left it alone and it took itself off to the woods where it belongs. Then Nick went to turn on the propane. He came back yelling, "WASPS"! Paper wasps had built a big nest under the eaves and were buzzing around like crazy. They had to go. We went into town on Saturday morning and got wasp killer.










The good thing about wasp killer is that you can shoot it from a long way away. It still makes them pretty mad, though.











They were so mad that one stung Paul on the lip! He needed ice to keep the swelling down. Some of the wasps were able to fly a ways before succumbing to the poison. I stepped on one in the front yard (barefoot) and it had just enough life left to sting me! Then I squished it.














We stained the woodshed. We are all sloppy with paintbrushes. Luckily, the stain is a nice tan color, so we looked like we had spray-on tan. Lucy, too!
















My sister and her family came up for the night. The cabin is kid-paradise, and Sam (8) and Ben (4) loved it. Especially the mud! Mud is good, nice and squishy! They also liked the treehouse, zipline, wheeler and piles of bones in the woods.









James and Sarah enjoying an adult beverage on the deck. I hear it poured in the cities, but there was just an off and on drizzle where we were.
We had a nice relaxing time that ended too soon. By the way, we didn't see a single squirrel! Probably out gathering reinforcements.








Did I mention Nate is learning how to drive? This happened backing out of the garage. Paul and Nate repaired the mirror on Sunday.

This morning the bellowing dog-beater was back in my yard at 5:45! I think he was a little surprised to have his ass (verbally) handed to him by a wild-eyed woman in a bathrobe, but I'm pretty sure he won't change his ways. I felt better, anyway. Now I'm a little worried that this bully will do something sneaky, though.



Today's recipe is for food that is deliberately squished. This is a sandwich that packs great in a cooler for a picnic or a weekend away. You can make it as squishy as you like. Me, I hate dry food so I add lots of juicy things. Paul wanted more meat and less squish. Suit yourself.

Squished Sandwich Loaf

1 big round loaf of bread (actually any shape would work)

Cut the top off the bread and pull out most of the innards. (Freeze these for stuffing.) Make layers of fillings, (I like the wet stuff next to the bread so it soaks in,) wrap in plastic, foil or a big ziplock. Put it on the bottom of the cooler, with the milk or something heavy on top. Put the milk on top of it in the refrigerator, too. At serving time, cut into wedges or slices. As you can see, my favorite fillings lean toward the Mediterranean, but you do what you like.

Sandwich fillings: (use any or all!)

Sliced sandwich meats, don't forget salami or pepperoni
Cheese of course, including soft cheeses such as chive-flavored cream cheese or feta
Roasted red peppers and/or spicy peppers
Sliced Tomatoes
Sauteed zucchini
Olives or olive paste (tapanade) (pretty much the reason I make this sandwich)
Pesto
onions
Marinated mushrooms
Artichokes or artichoke dip
Lettuce, spinach or other greens

Squash Boring

Oh, No! My squash and pumpkins have a squash borer infestation! I hate this, the cure is disgusting, but if I don't do it, the plants I started from seed will wither and die. The adult squash borer beetles lay eggs on the base of the vines. the larva hatch and bore into the vines. I can tell mine have this because there are little piles of mealy/sawdusty gunk where the leaves attach. I am afraid this is larva poop.











I don't use any chemicals on the vegetables, although if I had any Bt I'd use it. I do spray the apples, or they are inedible.
So, to get rid of squash borers, slit the vine by the pile of larva poop with a sharp knife.















Reach inside with a pointy tweezers while holding the cut open and pull out that nasty grub! Yuck! If you don't own a turtle, throw the grub on the ground and stomp it! Look at all your plants, there may be more than one larva per plant.















Cover up the cut part of the vine with soil. Usually they heal up just fine. Keep checking the rest of the summer, though, those beetles will be back.

















If you do own a turtle (technically, a box turtle is a tortoise, and an omnivore) let it eat the grubs. Tuttle says they are delicious and nutritious! He sure snaps them up quickly. He gets all the things I dig up while gardening. June bug larva are his favorite.

I don't have a recipe for grubs, so it will have to be a squash recipe, sorry.










Pasta with Peas and Zucchini Ribbons

1 pound pasta, whole wheat fettuccine or ribbony pasta is pretty
1 cup frozen peas
10-12 small zucchini, trim ends and slice with carrot peeler, knife or mandoline - 1/8 inch thick
1 1/2 cups whole milk yogurt or low-fat sour cream
1 1/2 cups loosely packed fresh basil leaves, very thinly sliced (other herbs are good, too, like cilantro or tarragon) Use pesto if you're in a hurry.
1/4 to 1/2 cup Parmesan cheese

Heat a big pot of water to boiling. Cook the pasta until it is almost done. Stir the yogurt and herbs together in a metal bowl over the boiling water to heat it up, about a minute. Set aside. Dump peas and zucchini into boiling water with pasta, wait 30 seconds and drain the whole pot. Mix with herb/yogurt mixture in a serving bowl, add salt and pepper to taste, top with parmesan and serve. Serves 4